It is a choice!

I don’t have a nanny this week. She has had a horrible family tragedy and needed the week off – it really is a sad story and I feel for her family.

I must say after a week with Jack on my own I was very ready for her to be here this week and did feel a tad anxious after her sms but fortunately in his own home, Jack is a lot calmer and we are back into his normal 2 naps a day routine – it really is lovely. I can clean the house, catch up on work, make dinner, get the washing done while he naps.

If Martha Stewart had to pop in she would be oh so proud. I am holding it together nicely!

Well I WAS. Then yesterday the pms bus hit me full on in the face AND I am faced with a situation that requires me to contact my ex which actually makes me want to vomit from the anxiety. Still I thought I was doing ok – I even baked some cupcakes yesterday.

Then Kiara crossed over to her crazy place and refused to do her homework. It was a 2 hour battle of the wills. Then I realised she hadn’t written her homework in the right place AND I hadn’t read the correct day so we did the WRONG HOMEWORK! The cupcakes, while still really good, had too much water in which I did pick up but couldn’t correct so they didn’t rise and are crumby (but whatever I made them for ME and I like them).

About 10 minutes into homework Kiara dragged Cameron with her to the crazy side and they were impossible. Shouting, messing jumping, messing, throwing, messing – it was chaos.

David likes order. He likes calm. He likes quiet. Unfortunately with 3 kids and a bit of a scatter brain fiance there is more chaos than order, more noise than quiet and on Sunday morning it was getting a bit much and he said to me “Its a choice!” and he chose to not let it get to him.

So mid way through the kids chasing each other around our (small) lounge with my crutches screeching obscenities at each other I dished up my dinner, sat down and said “It’s a choice!”

Well 10 minutes later I chose to loose it with Kiara. I yelled. I just could not any more! She didn’t calm down at all, she had a small cry went to shower and came back recharged and ready for round 2. I chose then to ignore it and handed over to David.

I get that it is a choice – I GET IT! But sometimes calming the chaos is the only choice there is to make!

How do you cope with your kids when they cross over?

 

6 thoughts on “It is a choice!

  1. Not very well. I wrap Child 2 nice and snug and put him into bed. Then I close the door behind me and let him cry it out. He eventually either cries himself to sleep or when he’s over whatever annoyed him he comes out for cuddles. It really depends on how HE feels on the day. I tell Child 1 to go to his room and have his cross-over moment in there. I figure that we all have bad days when we cross over and that therefore we all need to vent from time to time. I’m happy to have them do their venting AWAY from me. Doesn’t mean I like it but I have found that this (for me) is the only way to maintain my sanity because really, it’s either that or I choke them.
    My DH also forgets that they are loud kids and that there ain’t going to be quiet Sunday mornings – at least not for the next few years.

  2. It is most definitely a choice but sometimes one do choose to lose it and then sometimes you don’t need to feel sorry about losing it because sometimes you just need to lose it – to stay sane.

  3. I’m finding more and more often that I am able to choose to keep calm and not kill anyone. But I definitely still have moments where I lose it completely.
    We’re in a pretty good place with Megan at the moment, though, which helps.
    She’s been receiving some counselling from someone we know and it seems to be helping her to keep it together, too.
    I can only hope like crazy that the peace lasts!
    Good luck!

  4. Laura I wish I can deal with craziness the way u do. Trust me in my eyes u r a model mom.. My 2 attention deprived girls goes over to the crazy side every second of the day. Add to that an exhuasted 2 job overworked mother and father…trust me I wish I had ur little bit of patience.

  5. When James crosses over I put him in his room & D can usually calm him down after a few minutes. I just fuel his craziness though when I get upset so I work hard to try and stay calm or stay away. I sometimes cross over too though… :)

  6. hmmm I can’t remember ever going “Crazy” when I was a kid or refusing to do homework etc. Maybe make sure they only eat healthy food……diet plays a huge role in so many things. Also if they really get out of hand, spank them! they must learn obedience and discipline, not like a beating lol but I do believe in spanking.

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