I am not a baby mom. I have never felt comfortable with a newborn, even after doing it four times. I felt totally out of my depth, I felt I knew what I was doing and I generally flailed around until they started communicating with me (and pooping in the toilet).
I am enjoying the older two a lot more now and finally feel like I can actually do this parenting thing, even though it is seldom that I feel like I know what I am doing but I do feel like I am getting more right at the moment.
I can now honestly say that I prefer parenting older kids, here’s why;
You can TALK to them. I can now have actual conversations with them about whats going on in the world. We can discuss the news or what they are learning at school or whats happening in their lives. If they are upset, I can talk to them, (reasoning is still an issue) and try to explain the situation or offer some advise. It is also nice when decisions have to be made to get their input, it takes a bit of the pressure off from having to make a decision on their behalf.
They don’t need you for every single thing. This is a bit of a bitter sweet reason because it does signal them walking away but it is still nice that they can make their own breakfast, brush their own teeth and are happy to sit in their room and chat to their friends, giving you a bit of a time out.
Baking cookies actually becomes fun. Pinterest may be under the illusion that baking with your toddler is fun but the reality is it is fun, if your idea of fun is mess everywhere, toddler tantrums and invariably too much salt or an extra egg thrown into the mixture. When they are older and can actually concentrate for longer than a nanosecond, reach the counter and read a recipe, things like baking or cooking do become more enjoyable. This applies to things like going for walks, swimming at the gym or even a trip to the shops.
I also feel like I am actually getting to know them now and not just trying to make sure their physical needs are met all the time.
Are you a baby mom? Or do you also prefer the older kids?
7 Responses
I can definitely identify. Mine are still young, and I wish they would just get on with it and grow up! Am definitely not a baby mum!
Lynnith – I do have to stop myself sometimes and remember that they are babies for a short time but it really is not a fun stage.
So with you on this! The reward system with babies is a bit off for me personally. I feel the workload versus the joy was off balance in the beginning but its starting to balance more and more that she is independent. Still not at the potty trained and conversational age. I look forward to that!
YES! The work vs joy balance is totally off when they are babies but it does get a hundred times better!!!
I loved the baby baby stage but that doesn’t last very long! Also it felt like I could protect them more from the world.
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Yes Wenchy there is that! It is still easier though!
Oh I love the older kids – I found that from about 4 onwards I enjoyed my kids more and more. However I am not sure about the pre-teen and teenage phase. As yet!
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