Harassed Mom

Dear Kiara

There are a few things that, as a women, you need to know.  Somethings you will have to learn for yourself but there others that you are just going to have to trust me on.

As you plough your way through life remember these things because, baby girl, I am your mother and I do know best

• Never leave the house with underwear that doesnt match. EVER. Even if you going to gym or to buy milk at 6h30 in the morning – they need to match.
• Be kind to people.
• When you are in the company of boys please drink your wine out of a proper wine glass. When you are with your girlfriends swig from the bottle but when there are man people about – be proper.
• Always carry a bottle opener in your bag.
• Keep standing up when you dont agree. It takes huge courage to have an opinion, voice it and stand by it. Dont stop doing that – ever.

• Always shave your legs and underarms – ALWAYS. Cos the night you dont, thats the night you will get lucky.
• Never allow a man to determine your worth. No matter how much you love him – do not give him THAT power. If he can not love you for who and what you are – he needs to move to the left.
• Make sure your toenails stay painted. Doesnt matter what colour – as long as they painted.
• Dont fight with your brother. He is your greatest ally and will defend you always. You may not always like him, you dont have to. He will always be your big brother and there is very little he wont do for you. Remember that.
• Laugh. As much as you can. As often as you can. With as many people as you can.
• Love. Love deeply. Love honestly. Love openly. Dont be scared to do it again – even after your heart has been broken. There is nothing greater than loving someone.
• Your father loves you. Dont forget that. Regardless of what happens – remember that he does and he did the best he knew how to do!

• Be what you want to be. I will support any decision YOU make. I will never tell you what you should do. I will find the money to get you through Veterinary School if thats what you want. Or I will let you go travel the world if your path leads there. But remember to choose carefully.
• Boys are going to say stupid things. Really they are. Alot of the time they dont mean it. Forgive them. Dont be mean back – they arent as strong as you are. Simply forgive them.
• Dont ever stop listening to that little voice inside you. She wont let you down. Trust yourself enough.
• Take pictures. Of it all. Whereever you go and whatever you do – take photos. They are your memories.
• Sometimes there is stuff you just cant tell your mom and thats fine – you have enough strong women in your life to turn to but please do turn to them. If you need advise or help or anything.
• A broken heart mends.
• It is your friends who will carry you through the tough times. Let them.
• NEVER settle for anything but the very best. If its not 100% what you want – walk away.
• As much as it sucks sometimes you have to unfortunately listen and do things you dont want to do it. And as hard as it is – learn now to pick your battles carefully. Sometimes its easier just to do it.
• Read. Lots and lots. Read anything and everything. Its fine being the pretty girl but its more important to be the smart girl.
• Dont give up. On anytthing. If you want it enough then keep fighting for it.
• Fight fair. You are my child and even now when I watch you fight, your words cut deep. Sometimes the victory is not in leaving the deepest scar but in walking away.
• Your shoes, bag and belt need to match.
• Be you. Just you. It may terrify the world at large and people often dont know what to do with such awesomeness – but that doesnt mean you stop being awesome. It just means they need to put sunglasses on and deal with your brightness.

There are so many more things you will learn. Things I cant teach you – thats the job of life.

Some days I really worry that the world isnt ready for you. I worry it will try and change you, suppress you, make you conform. But then I watch you stare my dad down and WIN. I watch you effortlessly capture the attention of entire restaurants. I watch as you clench your fists and refuse to let me see you cry, refuse to let me have won.

Then I know that you will change the world.

Your Mom

Posted August 17th, 2009 under kids, life. Tags: lessons, letter to my daughter, parenting
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