Love, marriage, kids and date night…stories from real moms

Hello February, the month of love!

Relationships take on a new meaning when you have kids, especially in those early days. You have to get creative with your alone time and popping in to Checkers together qualifies as a date. 

I have asked 4 moms to share their advice, tips and experience as dating with kids.

Valentines Day Series|HarassedMom

First up we have Jacqui from One Messy Mama.

  1. How long have you and your partner been together?

16 Years – Married for 12. 

  1. If you are married, what type of wedding did you have?

We had a small intimate weddin of 60 guests. We were too young to afford anything grand. 

  1. How long were you together before you had kids?

10 years

  1. Where your kids planned

Most definitely planned. We battled for 6 years to conceive.

  1. Do you have regular date nights?

No, unfortunately not. We have 5 kids that keep us rather busy. We try and go out whenever we can, but it is not a set date.

  1. If no, how do you make one-on- one time?

We are very lucky that our kids go to bed at 7 every night. 

So we usually spend that time catching up, watching movies etc. Right now our life is a little too hectic for anything else. 

We have however booked a weekend away for our 12th anniversary in March. Way overdue!

  1. What is your idea of the perfect date night?

The perfect date night would be ANYWHERE without interruptions 🙂

We love trying out new restaurants, food, and wine tasting, so anything that involves those 3. 

  1. What is your most memorable date night with your partners

My most memorable date was definitely before kids. I got home to a trail of roses leading me on a treasure hunt with little gifts at each point. My husband then made me my favourite dinner and we sat on the floor in our one bedroom flat (just married) and we sipped on wine whilst we cured the world of all its problems. It was so simple yet so well thought out and special. 

  1. What is your love language? And your partners?

My husbands love language is most definitely Words Of Affirmation, whilst mine is Time. 

  1. What is the one piece of relationship advice you have for new parents?

To not sweat the small stuff. The more pressure you put on each other the more frustrating a relationship gets. Enjoy the simple moments and treasure the time you have together. 

  1. Do you celebrate Valentine’s Day?

Not really since the kids have arrived, however we do try an go out for dinner when we get the chance. 

It normally starts with a cup of coffee in bed and a few extra minutes of sleep. 

You can find Jacqui here:

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/onemessymama4/

Twitter – https://twitter.com/onemessymama4

Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/onemessymama/

Pinterest – https://www.pinterest.com/onemessymama/pins/

 
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31 Comments

  1. 1 February, 2018 / 5:50 pm

    Thank you, Laura! What a great exercise to sit down and think about how we manage our relationships. It definitely gave me food for thought! For one, to get out more 🙂 x

  2. 5 February, 2018 / 4:50 am

    oh that was so sweet, I love that they finally got their children and love to spend their evenings together like that. Gorgeous post! #globalblogging

  3. 5 February, 2018 / 5:22 am

    7pm oh how lovely that would be!! I like to hang out at home mostly, I am not a huge fan of date night that involved having to go out, I prefer to get my kids off to the grandparents and have the house to ourselves to just children and eat take away whilst watching good film. #globalblogging

  4. 5 February, 2018 / 9:02 am

    Love this . My husband and I have been together for 18 years and this year would be married for 14 years. We try and schedule date nights but it doesn’t always happen as things always pop up. The best of course is unscheduled – just spur of the moment dates. Alone time is usually from 19h30 at night when the kids retreat to their rooms. We don’t really celebrate Valentine’s day but will never say no to the odd romantic surprise.#globalblogging

  5. 5 February, 2018 / 10:24 am

    5 kids, wow. I’d be constantly wondering where I’d left them 🙂

  6. 5 February, 2018 / 1:07 pm

    My wife and I feel similarly. We (until recently) only had two kids (now three) but we move around a lot and often very far from family so options for babysitters that we trust are very limited which curtails date nights. Like you, we tend to make the most of early bed times and have date nights in often and then do what we can out when we can.

  7. 5 February, 2018 / 1:38 pm

    Aw what a beautiful story! Perfect read for Valentine’s Day! #globalblogging

  8. 5 February, 2018 / 3:37 pm

    It is so hard with kids to have datenight but we are intentional in doing so. #globalblogging

  9. 5 February, 2018 / 4:49 pm

    Lovely sentiment here. Love is the good times you spend together. #GlobalBlogging

  10. 5 February, 2018 / 4:56 pm

    I remember date nights when you have small children are mostly non existent, now that our children are older my partner and I spend a lot more time out together just doing simple things like going to local galleries or eating lunch out. #globalblogging

  11. 5 February, 2018 / 6:29 pm

    Valuable tips Jacqui! And I couldn’t agree more, Time is indeed the golden language of love.
    Lovely post x
    #globalblogging

  12. 5 February, 2018 / 6:35 pm

    What a fun series! Thanks for sharing!
    Oh how lovely it would be to have a dedicated date night!
    #GlobalBlogging

  13. 5 February, 2018 / 10:08 pm

    Lovely read.We’re very slack with date night :-/ but I guess when kids come along you find what works for you #globalblogging

  14. 5 February, 2018 / 10:14 pm

    AH a good insight into ones relationship! #globalblogging

  15. 5 February, 2018 / 10:25 pm

    Nice post. Although I and my significant other are not really into Valentines, the sentiment is great.
    #globalblogging

  16. 6 February, 2018 / 9:19 pm

    I love this, it’s so relatable. We try and have the kids in bed relatively early too. Evenings are our time! #globalblogging

  17. 9 February, 2018 / 2:06 am

    Wait, did I read this correctly. All of your kids go to bed promptly at 7pm! Please come spend a week with us! We need your help! Forget dating before kids, how about before smartphones! Oy vey! #globalblogging xoxo

  18. 9 February, 2018 / 8:26 am

    Wow! 10 years together before kids. That’s a long time. You certainly do have your hands full now! Love this. Thanks for sharing.
    #globalblogging

  19. 9 February, 2018 / 2:32 pm

    Being a single parent I don’t have date nights. When I was married we would occasionally have a date night but it was very rare. Lovely post! #GlobalBlogging

  20. 10 February, 2018 / 4:54 am

    Hubster and I don’t celebrate and we are kidless. I think it’s just a day that puts more pressure on people than is necessary. I loved the post! #GlobalBlogging

  21. 10 February, 2018 / 4:26 pm

    It certainly sounds like once you have children. Valentines covers everyone in your family. #Globalblogging

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